5 Little Things that Make a Big Difference in Family Life

5 Little Things that Make a Big Difference in Family Life

5 Little Things That Make a Big Difference in Family Life

by Steve Backlund

I remember as a young leader, when I walked through the door of my house, the Lord spoke to me saying, “Steve, now your REAL ministry begins.” I found that true ministry overflows from how we do our closest relationships.

Do you want to upgrade your family life? Here are 5 small things that will dramatically increase the likelihood of greater blessing in your family life: 

1.  Focus More on Listening than Speaking – God has given us two ears and one mouth. That should tell us something 🙂 We can take our listening to the next level by asking good questions that will draw feelings and desires out of people, by reflecting back on what you heard being said, by giving our full attention to the one who is speaking, and by responding in words and actions to the needs and desires expressed. There are many classes on public speaking, but not many on listening. Let’s take our “really hearing others” to another level. 

2.  Be Quick to Say “I was wrong” and “I am sorry” â€“ When we take ownership for our mistakes, it builds trust and deeper heart connections. As we admit our wrongs and demonstrate a heart and plan not to repeat negative behaviors in our relationships, we will find people are drawn to us in greater ways. 

3.  Prioritize Quality Time with Family – It has been said, “The family that prays together, plays together, talks together, and laughs together will stay together.” Let’s not put social media “friends” or personal pursuits ahead of our family. 

4.  Learn and Seek to Meet the Love Languages of Each Family Member  â€“ The five love languages are the acts of service, gifts, touch, words of affirmation, and quality time. As we understand these, it gives us a key way to say “I love you” to those most important to us. 

5. Pray Over Your Family Members Out Loud – It may be awkward at first for some, but it is the key for a strong spiritual atmosphere in the home to pray for one another.  

My youth pastor told us  to “never stop starting.” If we find ourselves slipping in areas like eating together, praying over our children, or saying “I love you” then just start over again today. Besides our relationship with God, our relationship with our family is the most important part of our lives.



Steve Backlund was a senior pastor for seventeen years before joining the team at Bethel Church in Redding, CA in 2008. Steve is a leader developer, joy activist, a revivalist teacher, and as Senior Associate Director, is a key part of the Global Legacy (a ministry of Bethel Church) leadership team. He travels extensively throughout the world encouraging churches and leaders and has authored a number of books.

For more, check out Steve’s iTunes podcastYouTube ChannelFacebook pageTwitter, and Instagram.